Last year around this time I was taken to a hospital in Chino Ca, for what..?
Well... For the last few months I’ve been thinking about talking about this openly and I think, finally.
I’m okay with it.
Sorry if imm all over the place with this post its just hard to think straight while thinking about this, I kinda get all worked up... Anyway.
I went into the hospital because
I tried to commit suicide.
I said fuck it and made a cocktail of numerous pills and drank untill i blacked out.
The photo was of me at the hospital were I was held for 3 days against my will and felt like i was fkn crazy psychopath.
I spent those 72 hours by myself for the most part. Now, I’m not going to go into detail but I was in a super dark place, rock bottom. I pushed all my friends away. I was doing a lot of bad things, self destructive things. Things that were just so stupid its hard to look back and be like “wow that was me”
I’ve been battling depression from a very young age but it never got THAT bad and last year just was definitely not the year for me and something in me snapped.
It felt as if the entire world came crashing down on me. Skating, my car was down, other stuff, just it seemed like everything. This year has been super difficult, every single day. But its gotten better.
I threw away all those shitty anti depressants. I dont drink nearrrly as much. Started talking to my friends again. I now actually want to skate and be around everyone. I have plans to build alice the evo back to where she was but even better.
At the time I let everything just go away because of my depression and I ruined a lot of really good friendships... But. I starting taking responsibility for my actions and i am working on myself little by little everyday. Its hard and I still feel depressed some days but
This year has shown me that I am worth something.
I just made this post to let my followers know that it doesnt matter who you are or where you are from, we all have demons we battle every day.
But if you ever need someone to talk to that will understand what you are going through PLEASE dm me. No one should feel alone.
Everyweek our team is getting bigger, I’m learning more, and I am that much closer to being licensed at @theivrigroup I can’t be anymore happy with where my life has taken me.
Surrounding myself with people that have the same goals, it’s inspiring!
If you’d like to join our team. Shoot me a DM.