A proud lion sits at a watering hole in the African savanna, when a giraffe approaches and begins to drink.
The lion shouts, “Whoa! What the hell ARE you? Your neck is ridiculous and those spots look like you got a sun tan through a fence! You’ve gotta be the ugliest thing I’ve ever seen.” The giraffe, aware of the lion’s reputation for bravado, rolls her eyes and leaves.
An elephant arrives next, and it too begins to drink. “Hot damn!”, the lion exclaims, “I thought that giraffe was bad, but YOU! The nose! The ears! The feet! You’ve gotta be the ugliest thing I’ve ever seen!”
The elephant shakes his head and walks away.
Finally, a toad hops up to the watering hole and begins to drink.
“This just gets better and better!!”, the lion says, erupting with laughter. “Your skin is green and bumpy and gross, and your eyes are so swollen they look like two balloons about to pop! You, YOU, are the absolute ugliest thing I’ve ever seen!!!”
Suddenly the toad cocks his head toward the lion and says, “Hey fuck you man, I’m getting over a cold.”